Diet and Lupus – What to Eat and Avoid to Minimize Lupus Symptoms

 

Click on HERE to Discover How You Can Treat & Eliminate the Symptoms of Lupus Naturally

Lupus (SLE) Sickness

Lupus, otherwise known as systemic lupus erythematosis (SLE), is a disease of the immune system. The lack of proper immunity causes lupus (SLE) sickness to be a cause for concern.

Therefore, the Lupus Foundation of America provides the following list to help avoid lupus (SLE) sickness:

• Avoid anyone who has symptoms of fever, nausea, vomiting, or diarrhea. This includes family members. Particularly avoid close, personal contact, such as hugging, kissing, or shaking hands with someone who has been sick.

• Wash your hands, thoroughly and completely, with hot soapy water for at least 15 seconds.

• Remember that some surfaces, like bathroom surfaces, office equipment, and store countertops, can retain the H1N1 virus. So, keep alcohol-based gels or wipes at hand, whether you are at work, at home, or out in public.

• Avoid touching your eyes, nose, or mouth. This is how germs spread.

• Use the crook of your arm to shield coughs and sneezes instead of handkerchiefs or your hands. They carry moisture which can spread viruses.

• Stay home from work or school when you are sick.

• Never discontinue your medications without consulting your doctor first, even if you are sick.

Lupus (SLE) Sickness & Infections

Infections pose a risk to all people with lupus. However, the risk of being treated with immunosuppressives or steroids is even higher, according to Lupus.org. Therefore, people with lupus should try hard to prevent possible infections. One way to do so is to talk to your doctor about taking antibiotics before dental treatment or surgical procedures.

The risk of certain types of lupus (SLE) sickness or infection can be decreased with immunization. Most people, with or without lupus, get vaccinated from diseases with little difficulty. Some vaccines will result in a lupus flare, however. This is very rare.

Hundreds of thousands of people with lupus get vaccinated with no adverse reactions. Vaccines that do not use live viruses carry no risk for this at all.

Two types of immunizations can cause adverse reactions in people with lupus. Allergy shots, for one, may cause flare ups. Also, lupus patients may experience difficulty after receiving influenza, or “flu” vaccines. Nevertheless, most medical experts recommend getting immunized and taking other protective measure to avoid the risks of getting sick. You should also speak to your regular physician beforehand when you are about to get any type of immunization or allergy shot.

It is difficult to treat lupus because, even as the immune system is attacking healthy tissue, it is also attacking foreign microorganisms that enter the body. The cure can’t be the destruction of the immune system, so doctors compromise by slowing or even halting immune system activity through a variety of medications.

Most of these medications are very potent and can damage the body with long-term use, so doctors design treatment plans that utilize immunosuppressant medications for only short periods of time. The goal is to control the faulty immune response, and gradually taper off the strong medication as the B and T cell (white blood cells) activity is reduced.

Lupus Vs. Fibromyalgia: Similarities and Differences

Lupus can be hard to diagnose because the symptoms of lupus are common to many other types of disease. Lupus vs. fibromyalgia, for example – they both cause joint pain, muscle aches and fatigue, and they both cycle through flares and periods of remission.

The root causes for these two diseases are quite different, however. Lupus is a disease of the immune system; the white cells normally responsible for eliminating viruses and bacterial infection misidentify healthy body tissue as a foreign microorganism, or more properly, an antigen.

Lupus symptoms vary greatly depending on the severity of the immune system problem and the area of the body under attack. For example, a lesser form of lupus known as “discoid” lupus affects only the skin, while systemic lupus erythematosus, the most common form of the disease, will attack bones and major organs, particularly the small bones in the wrists and hands, the brain and nervous system, the heart and the kidneys.

The exact cause of lupus is not fully understood, but genetics, gender, age and a history of chronic illness all influence whether someone will develop the disease.

Lupus Vs. Fibromyalgia: Comparing Symptoms

Fibromyalgia is not fully understood, either – but it is not an immune disorder. The tests used to determine whether someone has lupus will screen for: unusual immune cell activity (presence of disease and inflammation,) sluggish or clumped blood cells (anemia,) certain types of antibodies (antinuclear antibodies, or ANA, which are commonly found in lupus patients) and protein in the urine (kidney problems.)

These tests do not apply to fibromyalgia and its symptoms.

Fibromyalgia likely develops as a response to constant stress; it is most often seen in people with A type personalities or a tendency toward perfectionism. Repeated physical stressors, such as frequent exposure to heat and cold or muscle strains and injuries, are also thought to contribute to fibromyalgia.

Unlike lupus, fibromyalgia is not life-threatening. It does not involve tissue damage and death, and it is not treated with steroids or immunosuppressant medications. Fibromyalgia can cause sleeplessness, migraines, severe pain and anxiety, and depression.

Diet and Lupus – Lupus Diet Recommendations

Patients diagnosed with lupus have to make significant changes in their lives to cope with the disease. To make useful nutritional changes, they often need lupus diet recommendations: a list of foods and food preparation techniques that will help strengthen their bodies and minimize their lupus symptoms.

Lupus is an inflammatory disease. Hence, the list of lupus diet recommendations should include foods that would typically form part of an anti-inflammatory diet. In general, minimally processed foods and fresh fruits and vegetables are ideal.

Lupus patients should also have good dietary sources of protein. Eggs, fish, chicken, turkey, and lamb are excellent choices. They tend to be healthier than beef and pork. Fish is very easy to digest. Hence, it is often the ideal choice for those who have tummy troubles (which are not unusual with lupus). Eggs are very highly nutritious: They include important nutrients and micronutrients.

Lupus Diet Recommendations for Carbohydrates and Fats

The oil or fat content of lupus patients’ food is also an important factor to consider when drawing up lupus diet recommendations. Every human needs to include fatty acids in his or her diet in order to thrive. But that does not mean that all types of fat are good.

One must avoid using shortening to cook. Instead, vegetable oils such as olive oil, sesame oil, and flaxseed oil are healthy options. In addition, when cooking with these oils, deep frying should be avoided, as should heating the oil to very high temperatures (to the point where it starts smoking).

Fats are components of various natural foods such as avocadoes, nuts, and seeds. These are all great dietary choices. One should opt for these instead of highly processed snacks like potato chips or candy. Avocadoes, nuts, and seeds should not be limited to snack-time, though. They can be included in one’s major meals. For instance, mashed avocado can be used as spread for one’s breakfast toast.

Avocado chunks can also be included in sandwiches. As for nuts and seeds, they can be included in fruit or vegetable salads. For a special tangy taste, one can lightly drizzle vegetable salads with extra-virgin olive oil.

Lupus diet recommendations include carbohydrate foods, which provide patients with energy. Whole-grain cereals are preferable to refined cereals. They tend to be more nutritious and also have higher fiber content.

It is important to note, however, that some lupus patients suffer from celiac disease. Not only do gluten-containing, cereal-based foods give them gastrointestinal distress, but they also run the risk of triggering their lupus flare ups. Fortunately, there are plenty of cereals that have no gluten. They include oats and sorghum. Tubers such as yams, arrowroots, and taro and their flours can also make good alternatives to gluten-containing cereals.

Diet and Lupus – Lupus Dietary Restrictions

For those living with lupus, dietary restrictions may be necessary to minimize discomfort and pain. Overall, dietary restrictions are advisable because, when done correctly, they help to promote overall health.

An individual suffering from a form of immune deficiency would thrive on a diet designed to strengthen his or her immune system. Along the same lines, an individual suffering from an autoimmune inflammatory disease like lupus would do well on a diet designed to minimize inflammation and autoimmunity.

Lupus dietary restrictions are often extended to highly processed meats because the additives used to cure the meat are known to trigger lupus flare-ups. Examples of such meats include hot dogs and luncheon meats.

High fat diets are also known to exacerbate the symptoms of lupus. So it is appropriate for lupus patients to adapt alternatives to deep frying when preparing their foods. Poaching, steaming, stewing, baking, and grilling are all acceptable options.

In addition, the type of fat consumed also has something to do with the patient’s overall health. Avocadoes are fatty, for instance, but they are safe to eat. Oils such as sunflower oil, corn oil, and safflower oil are completely out of the question for lupus patients. They make their symptoms worse. Hence, lupus dietary restrictions should be applied to them.

Some patients think nutritional supplements and herbs are the panacea for all medical problems. Taking the right combination and dose of selected vitamins, minerals, and herbs can help ease patients’ symptoms.

However, one can’t simply take any supplement or herbal preparation and hope for the best. One has to seek medical advice on the appropriate herbs and supplements to take for a particular condition.

Garlic, ginseng, and Echinacea are among the herbs that have been observed to increase autoimmunity among lupus patients. As for Iron supplements, they have been noted to enhance pain, inflammation, and progressive damage in the joints.

A diet rich in vegetables and fruits is ideal for lupus patients. In addition, lupus dietary restrictions should be applied to dairy, meat, and eggs. These are all sources of high-quality protein, but they can harm the patient because they contain a chemical compound known as arachidonic acid.

For more ideas about diet and lupus, watch the following 3 videos –

Eating Healthy with Lupus

Anti-Inflammatory Foods for Lupus Patients

What Foods to Avoid if You Have Lupus

By Dr. Gary M. Levin, who creates the Natural Lupus Treatment program. Based on his long term studies and research, he discovers powerful breakthroughs that would have profound impacts for Lupus patients.

These serve as the highly effective KEY to slowing deterioration, preventing attacks, and promoting regeneration.

The natural method for reversing lupus is a healing process that is carried out through a simple step-by-step method to rehabilitate your immune system and boost your supporting body systems to rid it of all Lupus symptoms, the joint pains and swelling etc. PLUS re-energizes and purifies your body for maximum health.

To find out more about this program, click on Natural Lupus Treatment

How to Get Rid of Hives and Angioedema Without Expensive Medication?

 

Click HERE to Find Out How to Get Rid of Chronic Idiopathic Urticaria (Hives) & Angioedema

Holy Cow, What’s Up with This Rash?!

You wake up one morning, roll out of bed, walk into the bathroom, and look in the mirror. Uh oh—something’s up with your skin. There’s a strange red rash creeping up your chest, and a tingling feeling along with it.

The non-stop itching can leave you exhausted. You are unable to enjoy your favorite things. You suffer month after month and find you are losing hope of ever getting better.

What’s going on? Unexplained skin changes can be disconcerting, not to mention seriously uncomfortable. But should you be worried? What could be the possible causes of your skin situation?

Maybe It’s Hives or Angioedema?

Hives, officially called idiopathic urticaria, are a red, raised itchy skin rash. Hives are not caused by a virus. Hives appear as red, raised bumps called welts or wheals that can vary in size and pop up anywhere on the body; if you press down on the center of one, it will turn white.

They can appear anywhere on the body, including the face, lips, tongue, throat, or ears. Hives vary in size (from a pencil eraser to a dinner plate), and may join together to form larger areas known as plaques. They can last for hours, or up to one day before fading.

Angioedema is similar to hives, but the swelling occurs beneath the skin instead of on the surface. Angioedema is characterized by deep swelling around the eyes and lips and sometimes of the genitals, hands, and feet. It generally lasts longer than hives, but the swelling usually goes away in less than 24 hours.

Rarely, angioedema of the throat, tongue, or lungs can block the airways, causing difficulty breathing. This may become life threatening.

What Causes Hives and Angioedema?

The simple answer is that you have an overactive immune system. Your immune system “freaks out” when it meets specific allergens such as dust mites, medicines, food, or other environmental triggers (sunlight, cold temperatures) according to the American College of Allergy, Asthma, and Immunology (ACAAI). Other possible causes are stress and infection. Sometimes, the cause is unknown.

Identifying what triggered your rash is crucial. If you can identify the trigger, you can avoid contact with it and prevent more hives from forming.

How to Treat Hives and Angioedema?

The best treatment for hives and angiodema is to identify and remove the trigger, but this is not an easy task. Chronic hives may be treated with antihistamines or a combination of medications.

Antihistamines (such as cetirizine or fexofenadine) are usually prescribed by your doctor to provide relief from symptoms by reducing the rash and stopping the itching. Antihistamines work best if taken on a regular schedule to prevent hives from forming in the first place.

Some antihistamines cause drowsiness, especially if the user also consumes alcohol. Some are not suitable during pregnancy unless prescribed by a doctor.

When antihistamines don’t provide relief, oral corticosteroids may be prescribed. A biologic drug, omalizumab (Xolair), is also approved to treat chronic hives in those at least 12 years of age.

Patients with angioedema may need to see an allergist, an immunologist, or a dermatologist. Angioedema can cause potentially serious breathing difficulties.

For severe hives or angioedema which can see swelling of the tongue and lips or breathing difficulty, an injection of epinephrine (adrenaline) or a cortisone medication may be needed.

Home Remedies for Hives

In most cases, home remedies are all you need to find relief. Here are a few ways to soothe your itchy skin:

This may include:

• abstaining from or cutting down on alcohol
• avoiding certain medications
• avoiding stress, if possible, perhaps with meditation or relaxation techniques
• choosing some soaps, skin creams, and detergents that are mild.

Avoiding certain foods may help. Foods known to trigger histamine production include spinach, fish, yogurt, fish, tomato, processed, meats, chocolate, and strawberries.

Tips to reduce the irritation caused by hives include:

• wearing loose, light clothing
• avoiding scratching
• use soaps for sensitive skin
• use a shower, fan, cold water, lotion, or cool compresses to cool the area
• take an oatmeal bath with tepid water
• avoid known triggers
• applying a cold compress (which can be a bag of frozen veggies or a handful of ice in a tower) on your skin

Some sources recommend supplements such as quercetin and evening primrose oil, and vitamin C, D and others. It is important to speak to a doctor before using supplements, as these can trigger adverse reactions.

Keeping a record of flareups can help identify a trigger.

Natural Remedies for Hives

If home remedies aren’t relieving your symptoms, you may want to give a few natural solutions a try. Natural remedies typically aren’t regulated or approved by the U.S. Food and Drug Administration, so use with caution.

The following are 2 options:

Witch hazel

The natural tannins found in the herb witch hazel can help relieve irritation. You may want to prepare your own witch hazel mixture to use as an astringent to maximize the tannins.

To do this:

• Add 5 to 10 grams of witch hazel bark to 1 cup of water.
• Mash the bark up.
• Pour the mixture into a pot.
• Bring to boiling and remove from the heat.
• Strain the mixture.
• Let the mixture cool before application.

You can apply this to your skin like a mask a few times each day. Let it sit on the affected areas for about 20 minutes, and then rinse off.

Aloe vera

Aloe vera is a plant known for its healing properties.

Although it’s a natural anti-inflammatory, it may cause contact dermatitis, so it’s important to do a skin patch test before application.

To do a skin patch test, simply apply a small amount of the product to an unaffected area of skin. If you can, apply to the inside of your forearm. If you don’t experience any irritation within 24 hours, it should be safe to apply to any hives.

You can apply topical aloe vera to your hives as needed, likely a few times a day. Be sure to follow any instructions on the package.

Over-the-counter options

If home and natural remedies aren’t enough to help your hives, over-the-counter (OTC) treatments may be your best bet. Not only can OTC options relieve itching and irritation, they can target your body’s histamine response, which is what causes hives to appear.

Calamine lotion

Products containing calamine can help relieve itching by cooling your skin. You can apply calamine lotion directly to your skin:

• Make sure you mix the lotion before using it by shaking the container.
• Put some calamine lotion on a cotton pad or cloth.
• Apply the pad or cloth directly to the hives and let dry.

You can treat the hives with calamine lotion as necessary.

For more tips to get rid of hives and angioedema, watch these 3 videos-

Urticaria (Hives) and Angioedema – Pediatrics | Lecturio

Treatment of Angioedema: Case

How I cured my Chronic Urticaria

When to See a Doctor?

Hives generally fade within 24 hours and don’t require treatment. If your symptoms worsen or last longer than a couple of days, see your doctor.

However, you should seek immediate medical attention if you experience any of the following:

• dizziness
• swelling in your throat or face
• difficulty breathing

These may be signs of a severe allergic reaction and require emergency care.

By Dr. Gary M. Levin, who creates the Natural Urticaria & Angioedema Treatment program. Based on his long term studies and research, he comes up with some tested and proven methods for treating hives and angioedema.

He believes the root cause of hives and angioedema is an overactive immune system. The healing process is done by using a simple step-by-step method that rids you of all types of urticaria and angioedema diseases. In his step-by-step treatment system, you’ll learn how a healthy, natural drink available from any grocery store, plus a special vitamin regimen, will completely rid you of your current skin condition.

The vast majority of people who use his treatment method see a major improvement within just a few short weeks. If you have suffered from a skin condition for more than a year it may take you more time to clean and reset your body but the results are almost always the same.

To find out more about this program, click on Get Rid of Hives and Angioedema

What is the Best Way to Prevent and Naturally Treat Gallstones?

 

Click HERE To Discover the Safe & Natural Method to Dissolve and Pass Your Gallstones

Gallstone Diet – How Your Diet Can Prevent and Naturally Treat Gallstones

Most people don’t realize that a gallstone diet can naturally treat and prevent gallstones. Your diet can be a type of holistic treatment that can assist your body to flush gallstones.

Too often, though our diets are just the opposite of a good gallstone diet. So what does a natural health gallstone diet consist of?

Ways of Treating Gallstones Naturally

Your diet can have an effect to treat this painful disease that causes over half a million people to lose their gallbladders each year.

Can you avoid gallbladder surgery with the right diet? Yes, you can avoid surgery if you start applying a natural gallstone cure centered around a proper gallstone diet.

7 Tips to Start Your Gallstone Diet

1. Fats and Cholesterol – Most gallstones are caused by eating too much fat and cholesterol. So try to avoid fatty foods, cholesterol, and processed foods as much as possible. Most Americans get about 60-100 grams of fat each day. You should cut back to about 30 grams of fat each day during the first 14 days of your natural gallstone treatment.

2. Fruits and Vegetables – Get plenty of fruits and vegetables in your diet. Eat raw whenever possible instead of cooking. What’s great about fruits and vegetables is the high amount of water soluble fiber in them which helps to naturally flush your system. Be careful not to overdo it at first, since you might get diarrhea. To start, eat 5 fruits and vegetables a day.

3. Whole Grains – These are the good carbohydrates you should be eating in place of anything ‘enriched,’ such as white bread. Look for cereals that contain at least 5 grams of fiber. Breads should include at least 3 grams of fiber.

4. Dairy – If you drink milk, then replace any whole milk products with skim and fat-free milk products. This includes all whole milks and cheeses and whole milk sour creams. Get at least 2 cups of fat-free dairy products each day.

5. Protein – While meat and protein are necessary for a healthy diet, you need to get it from good protein sources. These include poultry, lean pork, choice beef cuts, and mostly fat-free (95%) lunch meats. Avoid fatty meats when choosing your meals. For example, between bacon and Canadian bacon, it’s the Canadian bacon that’s leaner. Should you fry or grill? Grilling is leaner.

6. Drinks – You can still drink a soft drink or cup of coffee now and then. Just make sure to drink a glass of water right after. Water flushes you naturally and helps your whole body to work better. Divide your body weight in two. That’s how much water (in ounces) you should drink every day.

7. Desserts – Who doesn’t like desserts? Fortunately, there are plenty of healthy alternatives to fatty desserts which can contribute to gallstones. Cakes, pies, cookies, chocolates, sherbet, and yogurt are all available in healthy, more natural varieties.

Save Your Gallbladder and Naturally Flush Gallstones

Your diet is a good place to start treating gallstones. Other good choices that can prevent gallstones include vitamins, supplements, and herbs.

Experts also suggest a natural gallbladder and liver cleanse that is explained in detail in the Gallstone Elimination Website.

Their simple, proven gallstone home remedy can pass your gallstones safely and pain free in under 24 hours. Please visit their website to learn about this safe gallstone home remedy.

Which Natural Gallstones Remedies Can Help Me Avoid Gallbladder Surgery?

There seems to be a mystery around gallstones natural remedies. Your doctor will probably neglect to inform you of the many safe and effective natural treatments for gallstones.

Yet thousands of people have now treated their gallstones with simple natural remedies.

Why You Should Consider a Natural Gallstones Remedy Before You Decide to Get Gallbladder Surgery

I have been able to help many people avoid gallbladder surgery. A lot of these people had actually scheduled the surgery and were able to cancel it after they tried my gallstone home remedies.

Beware: Doctors will not always inform you of the potential dangerous side effects of gallbladder surgery. Did you know, for example, that people who get this surgery face a higher risk of developing colon and bowel cancers later on?

Treating Gallstones with Natural Home Remedies

Here are some safe, natural tips that can help you avoid surgery:

1. For the entire next week, avoid foods high in fat and high in cholesterol. This includes most foods that come from animals, such as dairy products and meats.

2. Also for the first week, start eating plenty of fiber of bran, which can begin to flush your digestive organs and start reducing your gallbladder pain. Fruits, vegetables, and oat bran are great sources.

3. Vitamin C, also known as ascorbic acid has been shown to help reduce gallstones. It does this by converting excess cholesterol into bile. This is good, since most gallstones are mostly made up of cholesterol. Try getting at least 1000 mg of Vitamin C three times a day.

4. Cleanse your body by flushing out the toxins in your system. This leads to flushing your gallstones naturally as well. Here’s what has helped many people lower their toxin levels: Lecithin (1200 mg two times a day), Flaxseed oil (2 teaspoons every day), and Taurine (1 gram two times a day).

For more tips on how to prevent and naturally treat gallstones, watch this video – How remove(dissolve) Gallstones without surgery natural Home Remedy In Few Days

The Most Recommended Natural Gallstone Remedy

So now you might be asking…

What is really the best method to cleanse my system and also naturally pass gallstones?

Well, thousands of people have asked themselves that. And here’s what they discovered: The Gallstone Elimination Report.

What is that? It’s a simple gallstones home remedy plan that is guaranteed to pass gallstones naturally and end your gallstone pain in less than 24 hours.

It was designed by David Smith, a former gallstones sufferer after many years of researching and trying virtually all the options for treating gallstones. Finally, he discovered this simple gallstones home remedy that worked.

It’s easy and only involves some common grocery store items.

Click HERE to Learn more about this safe, proven gallstones home remedy…

3 Simple Steps to Help You Overcome Shyness Around Girls

 

CLICK HERE to Find Out How to Overcome Your Social Phobia

Shy Around Girls? 3 Simple Steps to Overcome It

If you want to learn how to stop being shy around girls, then this post will break it down for you in 3 simple steps that you can start using today.

A lot of the information on the internet about overcoming shyness around girls is just plain wrong. Back when I was shy around girls, I remember reading things like “Don’t talk too much. Listen and let her talk” or “What’s the worst thing that can happen?”

That type of advice would be great for someone who was already a blabbermouth, but how about the guy who is ACTUALLY SHY? What about the guy who can’t just go talk to a woman because he feels too nervous? What about the guy who’s smart enough to know that nothing really bad can happen, but he still feels that overwhelming anxiety that stops him every time?

Eventually I realized most of the people typing this stuff up had never been shy around girls themselves, and so they didn’t even know what actually useful advice might look like.

This Post Is for The Really Shy

Most guys feel a little nervous around the girls they like, but they’re able to take a deep breath, push through it, and become comfortable with them over time. That’s not who this post is for. 

This post is for the guys who feel really anxious, scared and inhibited around girls. If you get a strong physical feeling of anxiety when you think of talking to a girl you like, or you feel a powerful, paralyzing hesitation when you want to approach or ask out a girl, then this post is for you.

I’ve broken it down to three parts: Overcoming inferiority, not being too invested, and becoming assertiveness. This post is going to go into more depth than anything else out there. Bookmark this page now so you can come back to it again and again.

Now here’s step one…

1. Overcome Your Inferiority

From my experience teaching hundreds of shy people over the past couple of years, both guys and girls, I’ve found the cause of most shyness is a feeling of inferiority. If you feel you are somehow “less valuable” than the girl, then you will feel shy and nervous around her.

Let me illustrate this with an example.

Unattractive Girl Syndrome

Imagine a girl you know who is unattractive to you, perhaps she is overweight or just not your type. Do you feel any anxiety or nervousness around her? No, probably not. And if you do, it will still be far less than around the girl you are attracted to.

Think about the way you talk to girls who you aren’t really attracted to. Are you more relaxed and casual around them? Do you talk to them the same way you would talk to a guy friend? Meanwhile around a girl you find attractive your mind suddenly goes blank and you can’t think of what to say.

Why does this happen? Why are you only shy around certain girls? This happens when you place so much value on looks that a good looking girl becomes intimidating.

The solution is, of course, to stop placing so much value on looks. Treat an attractive girl in the same casual, natural way you would treat a guy friend or unattractive girl. Sure, you may be attracted more to a good looking girl, but physical looks alone shouldn’t be enough to immediately make you intimidated and won over.

I remember back when I was very shy around girls, I would start to really like a girl and start to fantasize about our future together… without ever really having talked to her!

In hindsight, it seems so foolish, yet so many shy guys do it. They become infatuated with a girl just based on how she looks from a distance. They haven’t even talked to her yet, yet they start to imagine a future together with her. (I’ll talk more about these unrealistic fantasies later.)

It’s better to have an attitude of “what else do you offer?” Does the girl have something other than her looks going for her? There are plenty of cute girls in the world, but it’s rare to find a girl you can have fun with and one that has a personality that “clicks” with yours.

Do not put the girl on a pedestal before you even know her. Treat her as an equal human being, not a goddess. That’s why so many women give guys the advice to “be yourself.” They don’t like it when a guy is trying hard to impress them and get them to like him. Especially when they haven’t done anything to deserve his attention yet except looking pretty.

Realize that how someone looks does not dictate how valuable they are. Being good looking is more about luck in getting the right genes than anything else. Would you think that a lottery winner was superior to you?

Being Less Experienced

Another way of feeling inferior is thinking that being less experienced than the girl with relationships will immediately make you repulsive to her.

Back when I was shy, I remember I kept having to think I had to “hide” the fact I had never had a girlfriend. I thought that if the girl realized from the way I acted that I was romantically or sexually inexperienced, then that meant she would just get up and leave automatically.

The truth is, by having an attitude of feeling undeserving of more experienced girls, then you are only sabotaging yourself. If you have grown up somewhat shy and socially awkward, then it will be almost inevitable that most girls will be more experienced than you.

In order to “catch up,” you need to start to talk to, and become involved with, these girls. That’s actually a great perspective to have. The fact that you are less experienced than average does not mean girls do not like you. It just means that you have some catching up to do because of your shyness or social anxiety. You just started later than everyone else. And that brings me to the last point…

Being Hard On Yourself and Insecure

Remember the first key lesson: The less valuable you think you are compared to someone, the more shy you will feel around them. Inferiority makes you feel not entitled to be confident and express your personality.

Ask yourself: “How do I make myself feel inferior than other people?”

One big problem you may have to overcome is your own thoughts. Many shy people have a constant stream of thoughts that point out what a loser they are.

If you constantly think about why you’re a loser, how you aren’t good looking, how you have some physical flaw that needs to be fixed, how you’re a loner with little or no friends, how you’ve never even kissed a girl, etc … then you are just sabotaging yourself.

By being too hard on yourself and being insecure about your appearance you are constantly reinforcing the idea in your mind that you are inferior to the girl. This makes it IMPOSSIBLE for you to be confident around her, because you think she is more valuable.

And if you are lacking confidence and can’t even talk to her normally, then you have no chance of attracting her and forming a relationship.

Confidence and personality are more attractive than physical appearance to most girls. Your looks don’t matter nearly as much as you think they do. If you don’t believe me, then look around. All the good looking girls are around the confident, popular, charismatic guys.

On the other hand, many of the good looking guys who are shy are stuck alone or with a girl they’re not really attracted to. Looks matter much more to guys than girls.

So the most important thing is to cut out any thoughts that sabotage your confidence or make you inhibited. This means to notice when you are having self-defeating thought patterns and stop them in their tracks.

Any thought that makes you think you are less valuable will only sabotage your progress in becoming less shy around girls. Notice when they occur, challenge them with the ideas you’ve learned so far, and instead try to focus on your good qualities that you are proud of.

Remind yourself that girls aren’t really after the best-looking guy, but one who can be confident and talk to them without being intimidated by their superficial qualities.

2. Stop Being Too Invested in One Particular Girl

If there’s one thing that all shy guys have in common, it’s that they have a tendency to pick one girl that may show them even the slightest interest and then become obsessed by her.

Stop The Unrealistic Fantasies

Do you find yourself picking out one girl that you like and then thinking for hours about what it would be like to date her and have a relationship with her?

Maybe the girl showed you a little bit of interest. Maybe you just talked to her once for a couple minutes. Or maybe she’s in your class and you’ve never spoken a word to her before.

If you are constantly fixated on one girl at a time and playing out fantasies in your head about what it would be like to date her, then you are again sabotaging yourself.

What do you think happens when you decide you want to finally go talk to the girl in real life? You’re too nervous to even move. You’ve thought about her so long and built her up in your mind into such a perfect creature that you become literally paralyzed by fear.

Meanwhile, the girl may not even be aware that you even exist.

All the thinking makes you unable to approach her and talk to her casually. And even if you do, the way you behave around her still communicates to her that you would be totally crushed if she was to disapprove of you in any way or reject you.

The problem is, you became too emotionally invested in the girl before she had done anything to earn your attention. You put so much time and effort thinking about her that her rejection of you would ruin your fantasyland image of you two together.

Don’t Have Too Many Expectations

One thing in particular shy guys do is they may talk to an attractive girl for a few seconds and then put too much meaning into the interaction. They may start fantasizing about the girl like I said above. They may go out of their way to pass her in the hallway. They may even stalk her photos on Facebook.

The key to avoiding this issue is to talk to girls without having a hidden agenda to make her your one true love. Don’t have too many expectations about a future relationship with any one particular girl until you have spent a decent amount of time getting to know her.

The reason why is that people tend to put out their best parts for the world to see.

Until you have gotten to know someone over a period of time, you have no idea what they’re actually like. That girl you think is perfect may be annoying to hang out with, she may be needy, she may be insecure despite being beautiful, she may be completely unintelligent, or she may be into the celebrity gossip shows you hate.

And if you don’t get to know her, then you’ll never realize you were just seeing her through rose-colored glasses.

The point is, don’t be won over by looks alone. There are plenty of cute girls out there. Many of those are as cute as the one you are obsessed about … and they have a personality you will like spending time with!

I’m sure you’ve heard the saying:

For every hot girl out there, there’s some guy that’s sick of f**king her.

So after you’ve talked to some girl, don’t start imagining a future together with her right away. This will just make you nervous to ever talk to her again. Instead, keep it casual and see where it goes.

Guys who have little relationship experience tend to be naive and think that most relationships develop like a romantic movie from Hollywood. Two lovers fall into each other’s arm when they first see each other. The reality is much different. Long-term relationships develop over time and are always a work-in-progress.

3. Be Assertive

One way to stop being so invested in one particular girl is to have many options instead of one. The best way to do this is to talk to many women on a weekly or daily basis. If you only talk to one new girl a month, then it will be hard not to think about her. But if you are constantly meeting new girls then it becomes a lot easier to see her as just a girl you talked to one time and that’s it.

Fate Doesn’t Exist

Many guys who are inexperienced with women have wrong and naive ideas about how relationships work. Maybe you think that the best strategy to get a girlfriend is to wait for the right circumstances.

Are you waiting for a situation where you just happen to meet a girl, you magically aren’t nervous about talking to her, don’t have to ask her out, and she makes all the moves? That’s like waiting for the stars to align.

The harsh reality is that you are going to have to work and learn to cope with your nervousness if you want to have a girlfriend. The universe will not deliver one to you. Sure, you may get lucky a couple times where a girl puts in much of the work to get to know you, asks you out, and makes all the moves. BUT … she probably won’t be the same girl that you want!

If you want something, you’ve got to go after it, especially when it comes to dating for guys.

Guys Are the Ones Who Make Moves

In our society, or perhaps due to our biological programming, it’s guys who need to be assertive about meeting new girls and becoming physical with them.

Don’t like that? Too bad. That’s just the way it works. It may suck if you’re a shy guy, but it is what it is. Learn to accept it and live with it.

You’re going to be the one to approach. You’re going to be the one who asks for the phone number. You’re going to be the one who goes for the kiss. Going after a girl you want involves risking rejection every step of the way.

How do you overcome this fear of rejection? You desensitize yourself to it so many times that it doesn’t bother you much anymore.

Don’t Hesitate

Being assertive is like a muscle. The more you do it, the less effort it takes.

When you want to talk to the girl you like, you will probably hesitate a little.

You’ll stop yourself.

Then when you try to do it in a couple minutes again, your “mental barrier” to acting becomes higher. It becomes even more difficult to “just do it.”

And the longer you think about whether you should make your move or not, the more anxiety you feel. It’s just like when you think of a girl for months and it becomes impossible to talk to her. You’ve built it up in your mind so much that you’ve become a victim of paralysis by analysis.

Instead, you need to act more upon that first impulse. That first impulse is your best shot at actually doing it. All the thinking that happens later only serves to talk you out of acting on that impulse.

If you talk to a girl and she doesn’t like you, then don’t start thinking of ways to make her like you. There are literally billions of girls out there, just try a different one.

For more tips to overcome shyness around girls, watch this video – How To Stop Being Shy Around Girls (Proven Tricks)

Conclusion

I hope these tips help you to get over your shyness around girls. Much of this information was a turning point for me going from a hopeless guy with extreme shyness and social awkwardness to someone who has overcome shyness and has decent social skills. Enough to talk to girls I’m attracted to without feeling shy at all.

By Sean W Cooper, the author of The Shyness and Social Anxiety System, is an ex-sufferer from social anxiety and shyness. This program is a compilation of his research and effort in overcoming shyness and anxiety.

Sean W Cooper’s Shyness and Social Anxiety system is a step by step audio course broken down into modules that are easy to access. It teaches you ways to start overcoming your social anxiety and self-doubt. The system utilises cognitive behavioural therapy which explores how feelings and thoughts can drive behaviour. 

The Shyness and Social Anxiety system is endorsed by professionals and praised by psychologists due to the way it provides the relevant skills to manage issues of shyness and social anxiety.

To find out more, click on How to Overcome Shyness Around Girls